Notes

Lea is enjoying a game with me where we don't talk, but we write notes back and forth to one another to communicate. I often fail to stay silent, but she lifts her finger to her lips to remind me. I was getting a little annoyed with the game last night because whenever she finished a note she'd poke my arm ~ poke, poke, poke. I've always disliked the feeling on my shoulder when someone does that. It's like slamming doors, another something that crawls under my skin and makes me feel irritated.

I would say,
Please don't poke my shoulder Lea.
Please stop poking.
Don't poke my shoulder honey.
Do not poke my shoulder....

STOP POKING ME!

She just smiled and then it occurred to me: she's doing it on purpose. And it's amusing to her. She's trying to get me to talk during our game of silence. And strangely, when she did it again, it didn't bother me at all. I finally understood it was a source of entertainment to her and when I understood, it took all the energy out of my irritation.

Today, I have determined I will not give in: I'm just going to write the goddamn notes and not say a word.

Sure I won't.