Last one (really) (For a little while)

But this morning I am at the gym.. and the past several days I keep reading and hearing about the World's Ugliest Dog dying. Whatever. I don't click on news very often or pay much attention to current events because I am doing other things, but today I'm on the stairmaster surrounded by mostly extremely old men and we are all watching CNN and the story of Sam comes on... that dog up there to the left. And this is the picture they kept showing over and over, and I could feel it coming up my esophagus, and it was like being in church, or a probably a funeral. Because I am one of those people who, no I don't puke, but I get the giggles at funerals sometimes. It happened in a ballet once too ~ I looked like a princess with this exquisite man I was dating, and the dance of the sugar plum fairies put me over the edge. So today, I like start bargaining with my psyche, "Please." I say, "Not now." Because I can see no one else is the least bit amused ~ they are all watching it like it is a scene from CSI, and they just keep staring. And then what made it worse for me is no sound is on, just captions and that picture kept coming on. So I tried to think about something sad. And I looked down. And I bargained. And then the last scene is of the owner and she's crying, and they go back to the Anchor and she is gives that fakey, sad, tsk-tsk look they train them to do, and I think, (whew..) it's over. And then they show the picture again! And I choke man, I guffaw. I'm such a fucking loser.